Nougat 5

Hello

The act of bringing forth life is such a mystical experience. I’m told no two are exactly the same. But sometimes there are complications; as occurred in today’s Holy Nougat

“Leaving Bethel, Jacob and his clan moved on toward Ephrath. But Rachel went into labor while they were still some distance away. Her labor pains were intense. After a very hard delivery, the midwife finally exclaimed, “Don’t be afraid—you have another son!” Rachel was about to die, but with her last breath she named the baby Ben-oni (which means “son of my sorrow”). ” Genesis‬ ‭35:16-18a NLT‬‬

They were on their way to walk into all God had in store; Jacob had finally gotten his act together. He renewed his covenant with God; and was on his way home. And, to top it all off – his favorite wife was once again pregnant.

Life was good

But, out of nowhere, tragedy struck. Rachel went into labor. Her system could not cope. She died.

What do we do when our world begins to crumble? What do we say to God? to ourselves? to others? The delivery was hard on Rachel; and she lived long enough to name the child – Son of my Sorrow. Did she regret having tried for another child? Or was she describing the pain and distress of childbirth?

I know of husbands obliged to make a choice. I know of ones who were left with the precious gift; but without she who delivered that gift of life. I know only too well what the pain of losing a precious gift can do, having journeyed with several families (at various levels of closeness) as we searched for the pieces of their new life – less one human – together.

How do we offer support to grieving families in these circumstances? What do we say; or not say?

Perhaps before we say, we could seek God for the right words. We might be tempted to talk about God’s will being done/fulfilled; and in the immediate moment of pain, that is not helpful.

On the other hand, we may choose the initial response of Job’s friends – silent presence. Letting the person know we are available but not overwhelming them with our words. Giving room for processing the grief, sometimes long after the fact and being present as they process.

And even then; we pray. Pray for God’s mercy and strength as they seek the way forward. Pray wisdom for ourselves to be present help as needed. Pray for God’s peace and comfort to carry them through the storm.

Please; let us opt to be supportive and not disappear because we know not what to do or say. We are all interconnected; especially as children of God. Let’s try to accompany each other in our seasons of pain.

In Christ’s love and grace . . .